We all have ways we learn as a person. For me as an artist, I am visual. I have to see something or picture something in my mind to help me learn but did you know there are different ways we love one another and like to receive love? Gary Chapman, Christian author of “Five Love Languages”, observed many people and how they respond to love. His findings of the five love languages have changed our marriage and can change yours too. I challenge you to read the five love languages below and take a quick assessment to see where your love language is the strongest. If you need a little help, Gary Chapman has created a quick assessment which takes about 5-10 minutes. Simply provide your name and email address. You might be surprised. This assessment isn’t just for couples; he also designed this assessment for children, parents of teenagers, and singles too. You might be surprised when you thought your love language was receiving gifts but in actuality you love to receive acts of service.
The 5 Love Languages
What if you could say or do just the right thing guaranteed to make that special someone feel loved? The secret is learning the right love language! Millions of couples have learned the simple way to express their feelings and bring joy back into marriage: The 5 Love Languages, Dr. Gary Chapman’s New York Times bestseller!
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.
Acts of Service
Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.
This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.
** Link to Assessment – http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/